I liked them before...

Whenever a group of people is talking about a band, Nirvana for example, and someone says something like “I liked them way before ‘Smells Like Teen Spirit,’” most people in the room secretly despise that person for a moment. Often they’re lying in the first place, but even if they are telling the truth, it comes off as arrogant. Why? Because they seem to be saying that they have better taste than you do; that they spotted the talent before anyone else did. But it’s not quite that simple. I’ve had the impulse to make quite a few statements like that, and while pride is often a motive, it’s rarely the only one. I’m sure there are many, but I want to examine three (skip to the last one if you want, it’s the most important):

Motive 1: Disarm the Popularity Haters.
Popularity and quality often appear to be mutually exclusive. (I do claim that there isn’t a lot of overlap, but that’s not important right now.) The “I liked them before” problem often arises when something truly good attains popularity. People who have never heard of this thing before assume it’s popular because somebody decided to make it popular, say, the media, a large corporation, or other celebrities. They assume that because it’s popular, it must be mass-produced, crowd-pleasing trash, but sometimes it isn’t. Sometimes it’s just good art getting the attention it deserves. If you "liked them before," then they don’t exist purely for the sake of being popular.

Motive 2: Separate Yourself from the Bandwagon Jumpers.
Bandwagon jumping is another phenomenon created by popularity. Some people only like things because all their friends like them, and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. Shared interests help strengthen community. But being labeled as a bandwagon jumper when you truly love something is an insult. Obviously if you “liked them before,” you can’t have been a bandwagon-jumper.

Motive 3: Mourn the Loss of Exclusivity.
This is a tough one to analyze, but it might be the most important. I don’t know how other people feel about this, so I’m going to talk from personal experience. For some reason, there’s a real joy for me when I like something that not a lot of people know about. The strange part is that I can’t put my finger on where this joy comes from. Here’s what I know: I know I get more joy out of telling my friends about it, and I know that the joy peaks when we all love this same thing intensely. Maybe it’s the fact that we have a secret, a prize that no one else can share. Maybe it’s that I identify with the thing so strongly that I feel I am somehow part of it. Maybe it’s the anticipation of future popularity and pride in saying “I knew them before…” (Here I go getting circular again.) I can’t tell what it is, but once the secret is out, once that part of my identity is stolen by others, the joy fades. Even if I still love the band, the movie, the book, whatever it is, it’s just not the same anymore. At first I want to tell everyone, but then when everyone knows, I’m sad. Is it just another form of pride? I don't think so. I don't know what it is.

So the next time someone says, “I knew them before…,” try to resist the urge to roll your eyes, label them as an arrogant hipster, or punch them in the face. Maybe they just wish that you could have shared their secret.